"You know that's not my finger don't you Miss?"
"You know I'm not really a "Miss" don't you Sailor?"
"Yes I do!!!"
"Excellent, then you won't mind if I put you in my mouth to clean you off?
"But the ink....wouldn't that bother you?"
"It's cranberry jam....."
"Then by all means feel free to take all the jam I can offer Miss!"