Saturday Matinee - Complete Privacy

"So you're sure I'll have complete privacy....my own private beach house and my own private beach?"
"Yes Sir....we guarantee our guests complete privacy.....your nearest neighbor will be at least 3/4 of a mile from you and there are fences between the guests areas...in all our years of operation, I'm proud to say, we've never had a single complaint!!!"
"What about housekeeping and meals?"
"All done at times you specify so that you may choose to see the staff or not....your menu choices can be sent to the main kitchens via a pneumatic tube or you may call to speak directly to one of our world class chefs....entirely up to you!"
"And if I need help or have an emergency?"
"There are panic buttons throughout the property that can summon our security staff in minutes....we have a full medical facility on the property and a trauma center that's staffed 24 hours a day by top notch professionals!"
"I'm sold....I want to book two weeks in August!"
"You do understand Sir, that it's going to be very expensive...."
"I don't care about money.....I have more than I'll ever need....what I don't have is privacy and to get two weeks to myself is worth more to me than you can imagine!"

The resort was everything they had said it was and more.....here he could relax and finally be himself....the food was excellent....better than he had dreamed....the chef hadn't even laughed when he had asked for Spaghetti-O's for lunch.....he loved Spaghetti-O's....had loved them since he was a child but he never had a chance to eat them...people laughed at them.....and he told the chef he wanted the whole family sized can for himself for lunch....he could go back to the gourmet food after, but he wanted what he wanted and they brought him anything he asked for....
The staff arrived at the precisely arranged times and he made himself scarce while they quietly and efficiently went about their business....he never actually laid eyes on any of them....and they never saw him....it was perfect!!!
On the sixth day of his stay he found a small rubber raft on the beach....but there had been no notice of any staff making an unscheduled visit....he would have to contact guest services to find out what was going on....
He was walking back to the house when he was grabbed roughly from behind...huge strong arms wrapped around him and began dragging him toward the house....
"Who are you??? What do you want???"
"Shut up!" the man growled back!
"Don't hurt me.....I have money....I can give you money...."
"Yeah I'll take your money Baby....but I've been locked up in prison for eight long years and you've got something else I want!!!!"
The rough man took the delicate fabric and tore the light summer dress.....
"Wait.....you don't understand....I'm not really a woman....I'm just dressed like one..."
"Why?"
"Because I enjoy feeling like a woman.....I have since I was a small boy...."
"You like feeling like a woman....even though you're a man....is that what you're telling me?"
"Yes....that's the truth!"
"Well that's good enough for me...."
He dragged the effeminate man into into the house and no one was close enough to hear the screams....

"Hello Sir....did you enjoy your stay with us?"
"Very much so....it turned out to be the perfect vacation for me....it was just what I needed!!! Has my driver brought the car around yet?"
"Yes he has Sir....it's funny that I don't remember your driver being here when you arrived...."
"He's new..."
"I see....thank you again for staying with us and we look forward to serving you again!"